Stood up in silence, have no words to say yet nothing in mind. Trying to describe the emotions that eager to out, but none seems fit for the name, none make sense for what happen.
Everything surround me is crumbling down, only the brain kept telling both feet to stand still. Isolate from everything that move and breathe, locked, alone.
Just when you thought everything starting to goes as it should, life takes over, nope… reality takes over it, never get enough to torture every single human that live.
Back to square one now.
What if… what if my time is not enough, if I don’t have a chance to say what need to be said, or a chance to hear something that I want to hear?!
I’m in a mid of a war in the dessert, and the hardest part that it’s with my freaking self. I wish I have a reason of why I should win it, place I can go and have my life settled down after.
Question is… do I have a home to go for?
Sunday, September 4, 2011
Sunday, November 21, 2010
James Blunt - Goodbye My Lover
I just realize that I have never post the songs that inspired me to wrote the novel.
On one of interview, James do say that this song was made from real story about love life.
It's about a girl, and about losing someone. So enjoy the lyrics, and hear the song on youtube! :)
Cheers.
-------------------------------------------
Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your hand.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.
I am a dreamer and when i wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bare my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.
On one of interview, James do say that this song was made from real story about love life.
It's about a girl, and about losing someone. So enjoy the lyrics, and hear the song on youtube! :)
Cheers.
-------------------------------------------
Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your hand.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.
I am a dreamer and when i wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bare my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Chapter One - The First Day I Meet Her
It’s a perfect sunny day. I stare at the whole city from my office window on the 23rd floor. Quite a traffic of cars and people, maybe because is lunch times. Even the park at the front of my office is full with employees having their break.
I went to my desk and dial an extension number, “Hello Diane, I will having my lunch outside. Do I have any appointment with someone after this?” Diane is my secretary. “No Mr. James, you don’t have any appointment for today. You only going to have dinner with your uncle family at seven tonight,” said Diana. “OK, I wont be back to the office in that case. If anything urgent, you know how to reach me. Thank you.”
I take my suit and car keys along the way out. When I close the door behind me, I saw Diane is getting ready to go out for lunch. “You haven’t go for lunch?” I ask her. “No sir, I’m just about to go. Rob already waiting for me in the lobby, we going to have lunch together,” she smiled while offering me. “You want to join us?”
“No thanks Diane. I will go for lunch on my own, perhaps somewhere nice. Beside I don’t want to bother you two,” I smile and wink to her. “Please, you can go now and give my hello to Rob!”
“OK, I will let him know. See you sir!” She wave and smiled, “See you, too!” I replied to her.
Been years since I know Diane and her husband Rob. Already six years since she becoming my secretary, the three of us like to spend sometimes together. Rob and Diane are much older than me, almost like my parents. I have been considered as their own son. Even though, they are so professional. Close to me doesn’t mean they want to take advantage from me and still acted as my employee when at work. I really respect them for that. And for them is a big proud for being able make friends without me showing my arrogant of position in the company.
Yes, me. James Smith. The owner of Net-Cyb Incorporation, the third biggest IT company in the world. I heritage this company after my parents died in car accident six years a go when I just joining the company for two years. I am the only son, so all the wealth automatically goes to me. While my dad is still alive, Diane already work as his secretary for twenty years since this company started. And all that time, I only know a little for Diane. She taught me everything I need to know about my new sudden position. She and Rob also the one that help me to wake up from my deepest grief. That’s why I’m so thankful for having them in my life.
I step out the elevator and go straight to my car and say hello to few employee along the way. I always drive my car by myself when I don’t have so much appointment on the day, including to the office.
I drive my car to my favorite place at the city side. There is a lake with a small bridge on the area. I like to spend my time over there to run for a while from cities routine. I love the calm atmosphere from the lake and the nature surround it. Not so much people know about it, only some. Except for the one that is living on that area of course.
On my way there, I stop to buy a cup of Starbucks coffee and two tuna sandwich for lunch. I park my car under the big tree like usual and head myself to the bridge.
“Hmm, who is that?” I’m wondering myself. I saw a woman sat on the bridge side, reading a book with her two beautiful bare foot playing with the lake water. I never saw her before. Beside me, never I see anyone at this hour. Usually only in the morning or at the evening some of the villager will be seen relaxing on this bridge. “Never mind,” I said to myself, “beside this is public area, so why do I have to think who that girls is!”
I go to the right side of the bridge where I used to sit. Being polite, I say a greeting to her. “Hi, good afternoon!”
She only smiled at me and back to her book again. A regular smile, but can make my heart felt warm. I stretch and start to enjoy my lunch. While eating the tuna sandwich, suddenly I feel curious and ask her, “are you live around here?” She nod and smile. Again, it’s the smile that makes me warm. She turned her eyes back to the book that seems like a love story novel.
I continue to eat and left her alone with the book. Sometimes I hear she make a small voice of smile and giggling, perhaps there’s something interesting from what she read. Believe it or not, it makes me smiled and giggled too. As if she was telling me a story. “Is that book interesting to read?” I try to open a conversation again with her after I finished my food. I don’t know why, but I’m curious to ask about many things to her.
Again, only a nod I got and a smile, but I don’t mind at all. “Hi, I’m James. Sorry if I disturbing you,” I reach out my hand to her, “can I sit there next to you?” She reached and shakes back my hand and let me sit beside her with a smile.
“Hi James, I’m Abby. And no, you don’t disturb me at all,” she said.
“Nice to meet you Abby. I often come here, but never see you before?”
“Yeah, I just move here three days a go and this is the first time I spend my time here. You see the house with white fence over there?” She pointed a house behind us. I turn my head back, nod and stare her back. “That’s my house,” Abby said. “What about you? With what you wear now, I don’t think you come or live on this area,” she said that with a teasing smile on her face.
I just realize that I still wearing a tie and my arm sleeves are still neat and buttoned. I let out a giggle, “bingo! I live in the city at a boring apartment room. It block with four wall, makes me feel like living in a square box. And yeah, I forgot to take off all this office attribute.”
She laugh when hear all my defenses. I was nailed to stare, her soft and cheering laugh have touching one side of my heart that never been reveal before by anyone.
Abby realized that I’m staring at her. She stopped to laugh and ask, “do I have something wrong on my face?” She makes me comes back to reality with that. “Sorry, I don’t mean that. Nothing wrongs on your faces. It just that your laugh is somehow sounds calming to me,” I said it honestly and make Abby blush.
We continue to talk. Abby told me about why she have move to this village. The house that she lives in now was a heritage received from her late grandmother. She loves the quietness. And from all places she can think of, only here she can get an inspiration for her hobbies on photography and to continue writing her novel. She lives alone, and she thinks the neighbors are also nice people. Almost everyone is older than her, where their kids and grandchild already move to the city and only comes to visit once in a while.
I also tell her a bit about myself. Start from my family, where I live, my dog, places in town and also my job. But of course I don’t mention about what am I in the company or the name of it. Not yet I think, beside I don’t want to surprise her for now.
Time really flies when I’m with Abby. If Diane doesn’t call me at five for letting me know she will be going home from work and to remind me about the dinner appointment with uncle Sean, perhaps I will never go from that lake. “I’m sorry Abby, but I have to go now. I have dinner with my uncle tonight. I really had a great time talking with you. I hope we can meet again next time I’m here,” I smile to her.
“So do I, James. You are my first friend on the same age since I move here. If you come and I’m not on this lake, you are allowed to knock my door house for a visit. You are welcome at anytime.”
“OK, thanks for the invite. I’ll go now. See you soon Abby!” I got up, smile to her again and walk by to my car. She wave to me. Just an instinct, I turn around and I still see her standing there, smile and wave again to me. Perfect portrait captured by my eyes that will make me having trouble to sleep later at night just by thinking of it.
I went to my desk and dial an extension number, “Hello Diane, I will having my lunch outside. Do I have any appointment with someone after this?” Diane is my secretary. “No Mr. James, you don’t have any appointment for today. You only going to have dinner with your uncle family at seven tonight,” said Diana. “OK, I wont be back to the office in that case. If anything urgent, you know how to reach me. Thank you.”
I take my suit and car keys along the way out. When I close the door behind me, I saw Diane is getting ready to go out for lunch. “You haven’t go for lunch?” I ask her. “No sir, I’m just about to go. Rob already waiting for me in the lobby, we going to have lunch together,” she smiled while offering me. “You want to join us?”
“No thanks Diane. I will go for lunch on my own, perhaps somewhere nice. Beside I don’t want to bother you two,” I smile and wink to her. “Please, you can go now and give my hello to Rob!”
“OK, I will let him know. See you sir!” She wave and smiled, “See you, too!” I replied to her.
Been years since I know Diane and her husband Rob. Already six years since she becoming my secretary, the three of us like to spend sometimes together. Rob and Diane are much older than me, almost like my parents. I have been considered as their own son. Even though, they are so professional. Close to me doesn’t mean they want to take advantage from me and still acted as my employee when at work. I really respect them for that. And for them is a big proud for being able make friends without me showing my arrogant of position in the company.
Yes, me. James Smith. The owner of Net-Cyb Incorporation, the third biggest IT company in the world. I heritage this company after my parents died in car accident six years a go when I just joining the company for two years. I am the only son, so all the wealth automatically goes to me. While my dad is still alive, Diane already work as his secretary for twenty years since this company started. And all that time, I only know a little for Diane. She taught me everything I need to know about my new sudden position. She and Rob also the one that help me to wake up from my deepest grief. That’s why I’m so thankful for having them in my life.
I step out the elevator and go straight to my car and say hello to few employee along the way. I always drive my car by myself when I don’t have so much appointment on the day, including to the office.
I drive my car to my favorite place at the city side. There is a lake with a small bridge on the area. I like to spend my time over there to run for a while from cities routine. I love the calm atmosphere from the lake and the nature surround it. Not so much people know about it, only some. Except for the one that is living on that area of course.
On my way there, I stop to buy a cup of Starbucks coffee and two tuna sandwich for lunch. I park my car under the big tree like usual and head myself to the bridge.
“Hmm, who is that?” I’m wondering myself. I saw a woman sat on the bridge side, reading a book with her two beautiful bare foot playing with the lake water. I never saw her before. Beside me, never I see anyone at this hour. Usually only in the morning or at the evening some of the villager will be seen relaxing on this bridge. “Never mind,” I said to myself, “beside this is public area, so why do I have to think who that girls is!”
I go to the right side of the bridge where I used to sit. Being polite, I say a greeting to her. “Hi, good afternoon!”
She only smiled at me and back to her book again. A regular smile, but can make my heart felt warm. I stretch and start to enjoy my lunch. While eating the tuna sandwich, suddenly I feel curious and ask her, “are you live around here?” She nod and smile. Again, it’s the smile that makes me warm. She turned her eyes back to the book that seems like a love story novel.
I continue to eat and left her alone with the book. Sometimes I hear she make a small voice of smile and giggling, perhaps there’s something interesting from what she read. Believe it or not, it makes me smiled and giggled too. As if she was telling me a story. “Is that book interesting to read?” I try to open a conversation again with her after I finished my food. I don’t know why, but I’m curious to ask about many things to her.
Again, only a nod I got and a smile, but I don’t mind at all. “Hi, I’m James. Sorry if I disturbing you,” I reach out my hand to her, “can I sit there next to you?” She reached and shakes back my hand and let me sit beside her with a smile.
“Hi James, I’m Abby. And no, you don’t disturb me at all,” she said.
“Nice to meet you Abby. I often come here, but never see you before?”
“Yeah, I just move here three days a go and this is the first time I spend my time here. You see the house with white fence over there?” She pointed a house behind us. I turn my head back, nod and stare her back. “That’s my house,” Abby said. “What about you? With what you wear now, I don’t think you come or live on this area,” she said that with a teasing smile on her face.
I just realize that I still wearing a tie and my arm sleeves are still neat and buttoned. I let out a giggle, “bingo! I live in the city at a boring apartment room. It block with four wall, makes me feel like living in a square box. And yeah, I forgot to take off all this office attribute.”
She laugh when hear all my defenses. I was nailed to stare, her soft and cheering laugh have touching one side of my heart that never been reveal before by anyone.
Abby realized that I’m staring at her. She stopped to laugh and ask, “do I have something wrong on my face?” She makes me comes back to reality with that. “Sorry, I don’t mean that. Nothing wrongs on your faces. It just that your laugh is somehow sounds calming to me,” I said it honestly and make Abby blush.
We continue to talk. Abby told me about why she have move to this village. The house that she lives in now was a heritage received from her late grandmother. She loves the quietness. And from all places she can think of, only here she can get an inspiration for her hobbies on photography and to continue writing her novel. She lives alone, and she thinks the neighbors are also nice people. Almost everyone is older than her, where their kids and grandchild already move to the city and only comes to visit once in a while.
I also tell her a bit about myself. Start from my family, where I live, my dog, places in town and also my job. But of course I don’t mention about what am I in the company or the name of it. Not yet I think, beside I don’t want to surprise her for now.
Time really flies when I’m with Abby. If Diane doesn’t call me at five for letting me know she will be going home from work and to remind me about the dinner appointment with uncle Sean, perhaps I will never go from that lake. “I’m sorry Abby, but I have to go now. I have dinner with my uncle tonight. I really had a great time talking with you. I hope we can meet again next time I’m here,” I smile to her.
“So do I, James. You are my first friend on the same age since I move here. If you come and I’m not on this lake, you are allowed to knock my door house for a visit. You are welcome at anytime.”
“OK, thanks for the invite. I’ll go now. See you soon Abby!” I got up, smile to her again and walk by to my car. She wave to me. Just an instinct, I turn around and I still see her standing there, smile and wave again to me. Perfect portrait captured by my eyes that will make me having trouble to sleep later at night just by thinking of it.
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Prolog - "The Day She Leave"
Never cross on my mind that this day will come this fast. The day where I have to let go half of my living breath and my soul.
I just stand up there in silence. Not a word I can say.
I stare down, to the last place where Abby will rest forever. The woman who always there for me, for good and for bad.
The funeral still going, I look at my surrounding. There, I saw our family and friends. Tears are on the faces, showing deepest grief.
I lift my face and stare at the sky.
Cloudy… even mother earth revealed the face of grim today, as if she is lost also for Abby.
“…, may you rest in peace and in heaven. Amen!” that is the voice of father Peter ending the funeral. One by one they approach me, give condolences of what happen to Abby and walk away from the burial area. I only can nod to show thank you. Until that time, still no word comes out from my mouth.
No one there now, only me. And I am sitting beside her gravestone.
“In Loving Memory. Friend, Lover, Wife. Abby Smith. March 3rd, 1974 – August 8th, 2007.”
That was written on her gravestone. Under it, was picture of Abby with the most winning smile.
“You know Abby, you are so pretty with that smile on your face, but it will be gone from my days and it will be forever…” I didn’t realize that I shed a tear. The same tears on the day my lover left me alone in this world.
I lay down there, staring the clouds for a while. I close my eyes, memories of the past start to rush on my mind.
“Do you still remember the first day we met, Abby?”
To be continued…
I just stand up there in silence. Not a word I can say.
I stare down, to the last place where Abby will rest forever. The woman who always there for me, for good and for bad.
The funeral still going, I look at my surrounding. There, I saw our family and friends. Tears are on the faces, showing deepest grief.
I lift my face and stare at the sky.
Cloudy… even mother earth revealed the face of grim today, as if she is lost also for Abby.
“…, may you rest in peace and in heaven. Amen!” that is the voice of father Peter ending the funeral. One by one they approach me, give condolences of what happen to Abby and walk away from the burial area. I only can nod to show thank you. Until that time, still no word comes out from my mouth.
No one there now, only me. And I am sitting beside her gravestone.
“In Loving Memory. Friend, Lover, Wife. Abby Smith. March 3rd, 1974 – August 8th, 2007.”
That was written on her gravestone. Under it, was picture of Abby with the most winning smile.
“You know Abby, you are so pretty with that smile on your face, but it will be gone from my days and it will be forever…” I didn’t realize that I shed a tear. The same tears on the day my lover left me alone in this world.
I lay down there, staring the clouds for a while. I close my eyes, memories of the past start to rush on my mind.
“Do you still remember the first day we met, Abby?”
To be continued…
My Novel - "Good Bye My Lover"
Hey.. hey..
I know if I keep on holding up - this novel will only end up on my flash disk, it wont go anywhere.
Sooooo, I will post it on this blog. Chapter per chapter.
I'm trying to finish up chapter two now. It's in Bahasa languange, and I just have a chance to translate it today for the Prolog.
Feel free to give any correction or suggestion. I know I still messed up on grammar :p
Enjoy! :D
I know if I keep on holding up - this novel will only end up on my flash disk, it wont go anywhere.
Sooooo, I will post it on this blog. Chapter per chapter.
I'm trying to finish up chapter two now. It's in Bahasa languange, and I just have a chance to translate it today for the Prolog.
Feel free to give any correction or suggestion. I know I still messed up on grammar :p
Enjoy! :D
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Personality Type (Hippocrates)
Looking from this four personality type, my result is:
75% sanguine
15% melancholic
5% phlegmatic
5% choleric
which one are u guys?!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Popular Sanguine
Extrovert – Talker – Optimistic
Emotions:
Interesting personality, like to talk and make the party live, great sense of humor. Strong memory for colors, physically mesmerize audience, emotional and demonstrative, enthusiasm and expressive, cheerful and have lot of spirit. Desire senses of want to know about everything. Good onstage, innocents. Live in today, easy to change, sincere heart and always childish.
At work:
Volunteer for duties, think of new activities, look great on surface, creative and innovative, energetic and enthusiasm, start with a bright way, motivate others to follow, charm everyone else to work.
As Friend:
Easy to make a friend, love others, like to be praise, looks fun, being jealous by others, not a holding grudge, quick to apologize, prevent boringness, loves spontaneous activities.
As Parents:
Making home as a comfortable places. Loves by they kids friends, Change disaster into humor. Guide of circuses.
Sanguine always be a pleasing personality, they like to talk and easy to make a friend with everyone and anywhere. And also this personality can cheer up every condition where ever they are and always talk because sanguine type really likes to talk. That’s why sanguine is an expert in negotiation and seduce, also charm with their capability in communication.
Sanguine has a strong memory for remembering colors. Sanguine weakness are they easily forgot about everything and always late when they filling a promises (because how often they forgot about things). Their weakness too forgetting things often happen in daily life of a sanguine. And a sanguine is a moody person because their feeling is mostly depends on their surrounding.
Sanguine like a new things that interesting according to them, but they are also easy to change to the other new things so they wont last for long when they are trying for something. Example, when they got a project with a long term finishing, they would not like details because they are not a detail person and always seeing the positive sides from things.
Sanguine is not a diligent person in doing something and they’re never going to finish it. That’s why in doing something, sanguine needs support from their surrounding so they got a spirit to finish a task.
Sanguine like to be the centre of attraction, in extreme level sanguine words can be excessive so that sometimes they could force them to lie to please people. In talking, sanguine didn’t think before speak so in sometimes it offend people, even though actually they are not meant to be.
Sanguine are really proud when they could finish a task that under estimate by some people. And they usually hope for praise for what they already do.
The Perfect Melancholic
Introvert – Thinker – Pessimist
Emotions:
Deep thought and full of analyze. Serious and diligent, apt to genius, talent and creative, artistic or musical, philosopher and poetic, appreciate beauty, sensitive for others, like to sacrifice, complete awareness, idealism.
At Work:
Schedule oriented, perfectionist, high standard, details, persevering and accurate, neat and organize, tidy, economist. Look for the problem, get a creative solution, need to solve what has begun, into diagram, graphic, chart and list.
As Parents:
Set up a high standard, wants everything to be done in a right ways, keeping house in neat, put in order children stuff. Sacrifice their own will for others, motivate intelligent and talent.
As Friend:
Careful on making friends, satisfied to live on background, stay away from attraction, loyal and dedicate, willing to hear complaint, can solve others problem, care for others, moved by a tears full of love.
If we come to a party and there’s someone sitting alone in the corner, then you are staring at a melancholic person. A perfect melancholic is a loner that busy with his own world, but doesn’t mean they are autism.
Melancholic are diligent in doing something and really like a work that need a perfect details, they like to finish what they start. In daily, a melancholic are love tidiness and can’t accept untidy, also they have a high standard on their way to live.
Don’t say “hurry up” to a melancholic, because they don’t like to be rush. Everything that being work by melancholic always perfectly think for the good and the bad, and the effect that would happen. In work, melancholic are full with thinking, analytic, likes diagram, list, chart and graphic. Usually they are creative, talented and genius of thinking new ideas.
Melancholic life is well organized, as human they are sensitive and easily get hurt or moved. Don’t ever hurt the heart of a melancholic, because they are hard to forgive. They always can control their emotion, but at one extreme point they would load out all. They also easily under pressured, and always seeing things from the negative side. In doing things, melancholic use to postpone, not because they are lazy, but because they are full of planning and always plan everything good.
The Strong Choleric
Extrovert – Performer – Optimist
Emotion:
Talented too be as leader, dynamic, active. Need changes, have to fix error. Strong will and distinct, act with no emotion, uneasy to break their spirit, free and independent, have faith and can do anything.
At Work:
Target oriented, seeing all the picture describing, well organized, find a practical solution, move fast to act. Delegating works, pressing on result, making target, create activity, develop because of competition.
As Parents:
Give a strong guidance, setting up an aim, motivate family for group, knows the right answers, organizing their house hold.
As Friend:
Not need friends to much. Willing to work for activities, want to lead and organize, usually always right, superior in emergency case.
“Born to lead” or “Born to be a leader” maybe only those sentences would fit to describing the strong personality that a choleric has. They are faith to be a leader because they have that strong leadership, with a great will and distinct choleric people could run any task that given to them.
A choleric really need changing and always fix error that being cause by other people with a good way or bad ways. They will soon arise to do a campaign and struggle for the truth. In daily, they can identified as a pig-headed, emotional, egoistic, and always debating to keep their opinion. Even though they know that their opinion are wrong, but they never will let anyone else win.
Choleric is a good organizer that what they plan to do and will do it systematically. Choleric never postpone in doing things, always move fast and fill with spirit. Don’t be offence if you stay near with choleric, because they always said what’s on their mind at that time without thinking others feeling and the consequences. In emergency, choleric always turns out as a superior. As a leader, choleric likes challenge, because it can develop them.
Don’t ask about choleric social life. Choleric person doesn’t really in need for a friend. If there’s a friend that disturb what they been doing they will get rid of them. Because they are a hard worker, for them life is only about work and work, so they almost have no time to take get a holiday.
The Peaceful Phlegmatic
Introvert – Observer – Pessimist
Emotion:
Humble personality, easy to socialize and relaxed, silent and quite type, patient, good on balance. Consistent in life, composed but clever, likeable and generous, hide emotion, happy to accept all purpose life.
At Work:
Capable and steady, peaceful and easy to deal, have administrative ability, problem mediator, avoid conflict, is good when under pressured, found an easy way.
As Parents:
A good parent, having times with their kids, not in a rush, can took which one best and which one bad. Hard too get angry.
As Friends:
Easy to socializing, fun, doesn’t like to offend. Good listener, “bite” sense of humor, like to watching people, have lots of friend, have mercy and caring.
“Relax first”, is a sentence that use to say by a phlegmatic. Have no emotions. And not expressive either. Phlegmatic is love peace person that always be a good listener and a loyal friend.
Phlegmatic is a type personality with a calming humble heart, controlled, and patient. If happen to be a discussion, a phlegmatic usually will be the listener. In their life, it seems they have no ambition because they apt to accept their all purpose life.
In socializing, phlegmatic are most like by the other personality type, because they are generous and accepting all condition given to them. Phlegmatic have many friends. Relax attitude that phlegmatic shown sometimes can make choleric let out their emotions.
Like choleric, phlegmatic also have a good administrative skills. In work, phlegmatic would be like by their boss and office mates, because they seldom whining if they were given a task. And they always finish their job good and right.
75% sanguine
15% melancholic
5% phlegmatic
5% choleric
which one are u guys?!
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The Popular Sanguine
Extrovert – Talker – Optimistic
Emotions:
Interesting personality, like to talk and make the party live, great sense of humor. Strong memory for colors, physically mesmerize audience, emotional and demonstrative, enthusiasm and expressive, cheerful and have lot of spirit. Desire senses of want to know about everything. Good onstage, innocents. Live in today, easy to change, sincere heart and always childish.
At work:
Volunteer for duties, think of new activities, look great on surface, creative and innovative, energetic and enthusiasm, start with a bright way, motivate others to follow, charm everyone else to work.
As Friend:
Easy to make a friend, love others, like to be praise, looks fun, being jealous by others, not a holding grudge, quick to apologize, prevent boringness, loves spontaneous activities.
As Parents:
Making home as a comfortable places. Loves by they kids friends, Change disaster into humor. Guide of circuses.
Sanguine always be a pleasing personality, they like to talk and easy to make a friend with everyone and anywhere. And also this personality can cheer up every condition where ever they are and always talk because sanguine type really likes to talk. That’s why sanguine is an expert in negotiation and seduce, also charm with their capability in communication.
Sanguine has a strong memory for remembering colors. Sanguine weakness are they easily forgot about everything and always late when they filling a promises (because how often they forgot about things). Their weakness too forgetting things often happen in daily life of a sanguine. And a sanguine is a moody person because their feeling is mostly depends on their surrounding.
Sanguine like a new things that interesting according to them, but they are also easy to change to the other new things so they wont last for long when they are trying for something. Example, when they got a project with a long term finishing, they would not like details because they are not a detail person and always seeing the positive sides from things.
Sanguine is not a diligent person in doing something and they’re never going to finish it. That’s why in doing something, sanguine needs support from their surrounding so they got a spirit to finish a task.
Sanguine like to be the centre of attraction, in extreme level sanguine words can be excessive so that sometimes they could force them to lie to please people. In talking, sanguine didn’t think before speak so in sometimes it offend people, even though actually they are not meant to be.
Sanguine are really proud when they could finish a task that under estimate by some people. And they usually hope for praise for what they already do.
The Perfect Melancholic
Introvert – Thinker – Pessimist
Emotions:
Deep thought and full of analyze. Serious and diligent, apt to genius, talent and creative, artistic or musical, philosopher and poetic, appreciate beauty, sensitive for others, like to sacrifice, complete awareness, idealism.
At Work:
Schedule oriented, perfectionist, high standard, details, persevering and accurate, neat and organize, tidy, economist. Look for the problem, get a creative solution, need to solve what has begun, into diagram, graphic, chart and list.
As Parents:
Set up a high standard, wants everything to be done in a right ways, keeping house in neat, put in order children stuff. Sacrifice their own will for others, motivate intelligent and talent.
As Friend:
Careful on making friends, satisfied to live on background, stay away from attraction, loyal and dedicate, willing to hear complaint, can solve others problem, care for others, moved by a tears full of love.
If we come to a party and there’s someone sitting alone in the corner, then you are staring at a melancholic person. A perfect melancholic is a loner that busy with his own world, but doesn’t mean they are autism.
Melancholic are diligent in doing something and really like a work that need a perfect details, they like to finish what they start. In daily, a melancholic are love tidiness and can’t accept untidy, also they have a high standard on their way to live.
Don’t say “hurry up” to a melancholic, because they don’t like to be rush. Everything that being work by melancholic always perfectly think for the good and the bad, and the effect that would happen. In work, melancholic are full with thinking, analytic, likes diagram, list, chart and graphic. Usually they are creative, talented and genius of thinking new ideas.
Melancholic life is well organized, as human they are sensitive and easily get hurt or moved. Don’t ever hurt the heart of a melancholic, because they are hard to forgive. They always can control their emotion, but at one extreme point they would load out all. They also easily under pressured, and always seeing things from the negative side. In doing things, melancholic use to postpone, not because they are lazy, but because they are full of planning and always plan everything good.
The Strong Choleric
Extrovert – Performer – Optimist
Emotion:
Talented too be as leader, dynamic, active. Need changes, have to fix error. Strong will and distinct, act with no emotion, uneasy to break their spirit, free and independent, have faith and can do anything.
At Work:
Target oriented, seeing all the picture describing, well organized, find a practical solution, move fast to act. Delegating works, pressing on result, making target, create activity, develop because of competition.
As Parents:
Give a strong guidance, setting up an aim, motivate family for group, knows the right answers, organizing their house hold.
As Friend:
Not need friends to much. Willing to work for activities, want to lead and organize, usually always right, superior in emergency case.
“Born to lead” or “Born to be a leader” maybe only those sentences would fit to describing the strong personality that a choleric has. They are faith to be a leader because they have that strong leadership, with a great will and distinct choleric people could run any task that given to them.
A choleric really need changing and always fix error that being cause by other people with a good way or bad ways. They will soon arise to do a campaign and struggle for the truth. In daily, they can identified as a pig-headed, emotional, egoistic, and always debating to keep their opinion. Even though they know that their opinion are wrong, but they never will let anyone else win.
Choleric is a good organizer that what they plan to do and will do it systematically. Choleric never postpone in doing things, always move fast and fill with spirit. Don’t be offence if you stay near with choleric, because they always said what’s on their mind at that time without thinking others feeling and the consequences. In emergency, choleric always turns out as a superior. As a leader, choleric likes challenge, because it can develop them.
Don’t ask about choleric social life. Choleric person doesn’t really in need for a friend. If there’s a friend that disturb what they been doing they will get rid of them. Because they are a hard worker, for them life is only about work and work, so they almost have no time to take get a holiday.
The Peaceful Phlegmatic
Introvert – Observer – Pessimist
Emotion:
Humble personality, easy to socialize and relaxed, silent and quite type, patient, good on balance. Consistent in life, composed but clever, likeable and generous, hide emotion, happy to accept all purpose life.
At Work:
Capable and steady, peaceful and easy to deal, have administrative ability, problem mediator, avoid conflict, is good when under pressured, found an easy way.
As Parents:
A good parent, having times with their kids, not in a rush, can took which one best and which one bad. Hard too get angry.
As Friends:
Easy to socializing, fun, doesn’t like to offend. Good listener, “bite” sense of humor, like to watching people, have lots of friend, have mercy and caring.
“Relax first”, is a sentence that use to say by a phlegmatic. Have no emotions. And not expressive either. Phlegmatic is love peace person that always be a good listener and a loyal friend.
Phlegmatic is a type personality with a calming humble heart, controlled, and patient. If happen to be a discussion, a phlegmatic usually will be the listener. In their life, it seems they have no ambition because they apt to accept their all purpose life.
In socializing, phlegmatic are most like by the other personality type, because they are generous and accepting all condition given to them. Phlegmatic have many friends. Relax attitude that phlegmatic shown sometimes can make choleric let out their emotions.
Like choleric, phlegmatic also have a good administrative skills. In work, phlegmatic would be like by their boss and office mates, because they seldom whining if they were given a task. And they always finish their job good and right.
Saturday, July 25, 2009
The Secret Meaning of My Name
And i mean my real name not my chinesse given name.
I never really believe in things like tarot. But when one of my girls gave me a link about it, i went curious and trying the menus hehe. But this result are quite surprising me, it's somehow totally describing who am i. Hmmm but still... this wont made me believe on tarot :p
What do u think guys? Is it all what u see in me? U all the judges ;)
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Your Card
Queen of Swords
Briefly: Her future lies in learning to trust others again.
Full Meaning: Physically usually (though not always) tall and/or slender woman. Quite often has dark hair. Refined appearance and conservative in dress most of the time. Gracious manner. She prefers sophisticated clothing.
Personality is cautious and clever. Can be cunning, destructive and manipulative. She is often aloof and distant. She keeps her distance and puts up barriers around herself. She displays an air of unemotional responses. She may appear hard, selfish and self-controlled. Beneath her facade she hides much previous emotional pain and/or hardship. She has learnt how to survive. She is a woman alone. She is either a widow, divorced, a spinster or without a loving partner. She may have spent a long time on her own and keeps up her defences and her sword drawn to protect her at all times. She has a fondness for red roses.
She looks good in black clothing. She likes to wear expensive or perhaps antique and conservative jewellery most of the time, though sometimes she wears some bold jewels. She knows she would or could be seduced if she lets her guard down. She is not a social butterfly. She can seem to be unforgiving in some circumstances, but this is her self-defence mechanism being activated to avoid feeling pain and disturbing emotional reactions. She cries in her sleep, and little elsewhere.
She feels more in control if she can avoid having too deep feelings for anyone, lest they puncture her heart and give her reason to despair. She can become big hearted if in the right company and circumstances and when she feels safe and secure. There is hope for her and she is wise enough to know it. She is symbolic of the rose, seductive and potentially dangerous, capable of cutting the skin and making it bleed, yet the soft velvety petals can blossom into the most beautiful arrangement and captivate your heart. She is wistful and reflective, serious yet sensuous, yet always alert. She is capable of being the Goddess or the crucifier.
Occupations suited to her would be the head of a company or large organisation. Also she would make a great surgeon, doctor, police officer, dentist or anything that involves the use of sharp items or weapons. She would make a good soldier, warrior, fighter or leader of a revolution. She knows only one truth, her own.
Her future lies in learning to trust others again. She has been severely betrayed in the past by women and men alike. She may need to take a leaf out of the book of the Queen of Cups, who is more giving, loving and affectionate. She could have a love relationship but only if total trust exists. There is no room for dishonesty or lies. If she is betrayed, she severs her relationships completely and irrevocably and never goes back. Friends are cast off and not seen again should they make the mistake to betray or abuse her. Her goodwill only stretches so far and behind that she may lose some of her sense of compassion, knowing that others should learn to be more self-reliant, like herself. She may go to the extreme of cutting off her husband's head, should he betray or deceive her.
Querent's card. If this is you, then you may be being called to meet the challenge of your strengths and you will meet this head on regardless of whether this produces success or failure. Even in failure, you will learn where you went wrong and this is the ultimate lesson.
If you are not the querent and this card appears, I suggest that you make an ally of this woman, because she can be a powerful opponent if you should cross her. She is loyal and steadfast to those she gets close to, just don't mess with her, because you will wish you hadn't.
I never really believe in things like tarot. But when one of my girls gave me a link about it, i went curious and trying the menus hehe. But this result are quite surprising me, it's somehow totally describing who am i. Hmmm but still... this wont made me believe on tarot :p
What do u think guys? Is it all what u see in me? U all the judges ;)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Your Card
Queen of Swords
Briefly: Her future lies in learning to trust others again.
Full Meaning: Physically usually (though not always) tall and/or slender woman. Quite often has dark hair. Refined appearance and conservative in dress most of the time. Gracious manner. She prefers sophisticated clothing.
Personality is cautious and clever. Can be cunning, destructive and manipulative. She is often aloof and distant. She keeps her distance and puts up barriers around herself. She displays an air of unemotional responses. She may appear hard, selfish and self-controlled. Beneath her facade she hides much previous emotional pain and/or hardship. She has learnt how to survive. She is a woman alone. She is either a widow, divorced, a spinster or without a loving partner. She may have spent a long time on her own and keeps up her defences and her sword drawn to protect her at all times. She has a fondness for red roses.
She looks good in black clothing. She likes to wear expensive or perhaps antique and conservative jewellery most of the time, though sometimes she wears some bold jewels. She knows she would or could be seduced if she lets her guard down. She is not a social butterfly. She can seem to be unforgiving in some circumstances, but this is her self-defence mechanism being activated to avoid feeling pain and disturbing emotional reactions. She cries in her sleep, and little elsewhere.
She feels more in control if she can avoid having too deep feelings for anyone, lest they puncture her heart and give her reason to despair. She can become big hearted if in the right company and circumstances and when she feels safe and secure. There is hope for her and she is wise enough to know it. She is symbolic of the rose, seductive and potentially dangerous, capable of cutting the skin and making it bleed, yet the soft velvety petals can blossom into the most beautiful arrangement and captivate your heart. She is wistful and reflective, serious yet sensuous, yet always alert. She is capable of being the Goddess or the crucifier.
Occupations suited to her would be the head of a company or large organisation. Also she would make a great surgeon, doctor, police officer, dentist or anything that involves the use of sharp items or weapons. She would make a good soldier, warrior, fighter or leader of a revolution. She knows only one truth, her own.
Her future lies in learning to trust others again. She has been severely betrayed in the past by women and men alike. She may need to take a leaf out of the book of the Queen of Cups, who is more giving, loving and affectionate. She could have a love relationship but only if total trust exists. There is no room for dishonesty or lies. If she is betrayed, she severs her relationships completely and irrevocably and never goes back. Friends are cast off and not seen again should they make the mistake to betray or abuse her. Her goodwill only stretches so far and behind that she may lose some of her sense of compassion, knowing that others should learn to be more self-reliant, like herself. She may go to the extreme of cutting off her husband's head, should he betray or deceive her.
Querent's card. If this is you, then you may be being called to meet the challenge of your strengths and you will meet this head on regardless of whether this produces success or failure. Even in failure, you will learn where you went wrong and this is the ultimate lesson.
If you are not the querent and this card appears, I suggest that you make an ally of this woman, because she can be a powerful opponent if you should cross her. She is loyal and steadfast to those she gets close to, just don't mess with her, because you will wish you hadn't.
Sagittarius Woman
I forgot where did I got this article. But from what I read, it is true. Dunno with u, the other sagittarius woman out there?!
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A tall slim and graceful woman who walked proudly like she is walking in a beauty pageant competition. If she slips or nearly falls, she will nicely covered it up and continue with her graceful and impressive walking step. She knows how to use make up to enhance her beauty. She looks at the world positively, so her face always seems so happy. She will not get up set easily.
Self confident woman who belief in her own style. She will not follow fashion, but standing in between simplicity and too modern. She is a very open person, sometimes can be to blunt. She is an honest person and never try to cause troubles for any one.
She likes to say something that you do not want to hear and yet she can say something so pleasing at the same time. Example she may say “I wish you could make more money, so you could afford better cloth, but anyway it is better this way. If you make more money you could be thinking of money too much and become greedy”. She can say such thing and make you wonder if you should get up set or love her more.
She is also a free spirit and does not like to stay home. She likes to be protected, but not to give her orders. She has no respect to a weak man. If she try to over powered you, then you have to calm her down and try to control her to be in a limit by doing the same thing too. She will listen if she respect you. She likes to be herself and like her guy to be himself.
She is a no nonsense woman, so you will not hear she says “Guess what I will do next”, or “Guess what I am thinking” because she always say what she is thinking out loud like a guy. If you do not understand her in this matter, you could easily break up with her. She sees problems in her love life as another funny story. She is clumsy and it is in her nature. You may think it is cute, but for some neat guys this could be unbearable. She is very friendly, so she can easily turn her enemy to be her friends.
She has good taste in fine cloths, good food, first class and first services. Even a poor woman in this zodiac will struggle to afford such a good taste. She could spent lots of money as if she can not understand how difficult it is to make money. If you think of let her borrow money, think again.
She is a paranoid. If she thinks you like her, she may already think about getting marry and lost her freedom and so on and on. A jolly woman who loves sports.
She is an ordinary woman who could dress like a tomboy. She has more guy friends and sometimes could act like one of the guy. She does not care about rumors, so she can get home very late and couldn’t careless what her neighbor will gossip about her. She thinks either good or bad, you will know it yourself, so you should not bother what people think.
Her wit and innocent look are her charms. She is often hurts from love, but never afraid to look for a new one as if she is singing “Do that to me one more time”. She likes going straight and being straight forward. She will not go around to get what she wants, or beat around the bush just to say something. If you meet her and tell her straight what you think, she will admire you.
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A tall slim and graceful woman who walked proudly like she is walking in a beauty pageant competition. If she slips or nearly falls, she will nicely covered it up and continue with her graceful and impressive walking step. She knows how to use make up to enhance her beauty. She looks at the world positively, so her face always seems so happy. She will not get up set easily.
Self confident woman who belief in her own style. She will not follow fashion, but standing in between simplicity and too modern. She is a very open person, sometimes can be to blunt. She is an honest person and never try to cause troubles for any one.
She likes to say something that you do not want to hear and yet she can say something so pleasing at the same time. Example she may say “I wish you could make more money, so you could afford better cloth, but anyway it is better this way. If you make more money you could be thinking of money too much and become greedy”. She can say such thing and make you wonder if you should get up set or love her more.
She is also a free spirit and does not like to stay home. She likes to be protected, but not to give her orders. She has no respect to a weak man. If she try to over powered you, then you have to calm her down and try to control her to be in a limit by doing the same thing too. She will listen if she respect you. She likes to be herself and like her guy to be himself.
She is a no nonsense woman, so you will not hear she says “Guess what I will do next”, or “Guess what I am thinking” because she always say what she is thinking out loud like a guy. If you do not understand her in this matter, you could easily break up with her. She sees problems in her love life as another funny story. She is clumsy and it is in her nature. You may think it is cute, but for some neat guys this could be unbearable. She is very friendly, so she can easily turn her enemy to be her friends.
She has good taste in fine cloths, good food, first class and first services. Even a poor woman in this zodiac will struggle to afford such a good taste. She could spent lots of money as if she can not understand how difficult it is to make money. If you think of let her borrow money, think again.
She is a paranoid. If she thinks you like her, she may already think about getting marry and lost her freedom and so on and on. A jolly woman who loves sports.
She is an ordinary woman who could dress like a tomboy. She has more guy friends and sometimes could act like one of the guy. She does not care about rumors, so she can get home very late and couldn’t careless what her neighbor will gossip about her. She thinks either good or bad, you will know it yourself, so you should not bother what people think.
Her wit and innocent look are her charms. She is often hurts from love, but never afraid to look for a new one as if she is singing “Do that to me one more time”. She likes going straight and being straight forward. She will not go around to get what she wants, or beat around the bush just to say something. If you meet her and tell her straight what you think, she will admire you.
Friday, July 17, 2009
Black to Colorful
Black…
Only those I can see in my eye sight. No colors caught by it. I keep on walking, reaching for what I can reach. But only could grasping for air. Like I were walk in dark space with no end. Same as a blind, walk without knowing which way to step over my feet and go.
Where am I? What happen? None of the voice answers me. Only could hear my own breath. Voice of my heart beating fast, and I even could hear my blood stream. Silence surrounding me. I stop at one point, has no more power to find direction. I’m tired, I want to give up. I try to calm, I force my heart beating in a rhyme. I close my eyes, hoping that darkness would disappear.
Times keep ticking, until I made myself ready. I open my eyes, slowly. I could not believe what I see. I saw color, yes colors… so beautiful as if I was born for the first time and see the world with my two eyes. I try to touch it, soft… no, so soft. No more endless space. I found boundary.
I look at my new world. Step over it. I want to live here forever. My heart overwhelmed by peace and bliss. Beautiful world, filled with colors. None could trade anything with these joyful feelings.
Farewell black… and welcome colorful!
Only those I can see in my eye sight. No colors caught by it. I keep on walking, reaching for what I can reach. But only could grasping for air. Like I were walk in dark space with no end. Same as a blind, walk without knowing which way to step over my feet and go.
Where am I? What happen? None of the voice answers me. Only could hear my own breath. Voice of my heart beating fast, and I even could hear my blood stream. Silence surrounding me. I stop at one point, has no more power to find direction. I’m tired, I want to give up. I try to calm, I force my heart beating in a rhyme. I close my eyes, hoping that darkness would disappear.
Times keep ticking, until I made myself ready. I open my eyes, slowly. I could not believe what I see. I saw color, yes colors… so beautiful as if I was born for the first time and see the world with my two eyes. I try to touch it, soft… no, so soft. No more endless space. I found boundary.
I look at my new world. Step over it. I want to live here forever. My heart overwhelmed by peace and bliss. Beautiful world, filled with colors. None could trade anything with these joyful feelings.
Farewell black… and welcome colorful!
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